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Wednesday, January 28, 2009

295. find me some land, my pilgrim

keaton said, your job is to find us a piece of land, like the pilgrims did.
i asked, for what?
she said, so we can become self-sustaining. it will need plenty of sun, and wind, and water, and rich soil.
i asked, okay. how about down south?
she said, too humid and they’re not quite over the civil war yet.
i asked, how about pennsylvania?
she said, bad roads and the home or rick santorum. enough said.
i asked, how about west of pennsylvania?
she said, that’s the heartland, it’s not where the brains are.
i asked, how about new england?
she said, too cold and that live free or die stuff gives me the creeps.
i said, i know, how about the great northwest? yeah, the northwest!
she said, too many serial killers and besides it’s too far from manhattan.
i said, how about the western hills of new jersey, like right here.
she said, it's too close to home! keep thinking though, you're onto something.
and i thought, whew, this pilgrim stuff is hard work.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

try melbourne australia, it has everything you need and you would swear you in manhattan.

itsmecissy said...

HEY, what about the Left Coast (California) - the land of fruit, flakes and nuts. keaton would so, you know, like it here.

BTW, my word verification word for posting this is "tartless," pretty funny, hey?

Anonymous said...

So Bob, have you found your little piece (or peace) of heaven? It will be hard to find a more "Pond accessible" place than where you are right now. Tough call.