"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

793. a breach of the multitask code of conduct

keaton is on the left coast gettin' all smarted up once again.
she enjoys it and that makes me happy.
but happiness can be fleeting at best.

exhibit a: the phone call this morning.

keaton: yeah, so i had fun last night with some of the gang.
me: sounds like things are going well for ya. that makes me hap—

fllaaa ... ooossshhh!

me: what the hell was that? it sounded like a toilet. are you on the toilet?
keaton: i'm multitasking.
me: what? talking to me and taking a dump at the same time?
keaton: well, that's not exactly how i'd put it.
me: there's no other way! some things are not multitask worthy, a bowel movement being one of the top three.
keaton: what are ya talking about, you do the tv guide crossword while you're on the toilet. that's multitasking.
me: yeah, i guess, but i don't know. it's not the same thing. it doesn't draw in other people. there've gotta be some rules. this is a clear breach of the code of multitask conduct.
keaton: breach, shmeach! i consider it a matter of a person's right to choose. i mean, the next thing i know, you'll take away my rights to an abortion.
me: i don't think anytime soon but i see where your goin' with all this. anyway, i don't know, somethings stinks about the whole thing.
keaton: you're tellin' me. that's why i flushed.

then i thought, i'm not so sure about this smartin' her up stuff. her arguments, while technically sound, seem to be void of any common decency.


and talk about happiness being fleeting.
this time it didn't even get past the first syllable.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you are going to be so rude as to take a dump while talking on the phone, at least don't let the person to whom you are talking know by flushing. You could pretend the call dropped, and then call back and say, "Oh, I'm so sorry. The call dropped." No need to get into the whole flush thing!!!

Anonymous said...

I have this girlfriend down under that i talk to ,but the timing thing is a little confusing so i picked a time when she is at home, well that is also the time women need to get ready to go to work, lot of multitasking going on, she say hey i'm going to the ladies, so being the gentleman i said "i will call you in 15 minutes". she said hell no, this is our talk time so you talk, lets just say the conversation went south after that.
the toilet was not the only thing a littled flushed after that.

itsmecissy said...

I never flush while "multitasking." I can tell when someone else is though, the echo gives them away.

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Robert Crane said...

lightly, you break me up. you have a lot goin' on there.

sissy, you're not much better. in fact, were you multitasking when you wrote that comment? i get a scents you were.

(oh baby, note to bob, work on pun skills)

itsmecissy said...

Why, did you hear the echo?