"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Sunday, February 13, 2011

(from the files) 315. manstake mulligan!

keaton said, i see you didn’t get the garbage out in time for the garbage truck.
i yelled, manstake mulligan!
she said, are you sure you want to do that? it’s so early in the day and you know you are playing with a really high handicap ever since you killed my prized flowering clematis because you thought it was poison ivy (see post #185 for details).
i said, yeah, well anything whose name sounds like a female private part is asking for trouble besides i’m feeling on top of my man game.
she shook her head and said, god you're impossible sometimes.
and i said, the impossible dream honey bunch.
then she said, i'm going to load up on some frozen porkchops. so be very careful little man.
she was right.
within minutes i had set the kitchen ablaze making her a cup of earl grey and then smashed her car’s rear bumper backing up into an oak tree that’s only been there for like nineteen years now.

it’s apparent i need to spend more time at the practice tea and driving range.

1 comment:

itsmecissy said...

Seems like keaton's given you a lot of mulligans over the years. I wouldn't press my luck...