"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Friday, November 28, 2008

(from the files) 14. the am-i-fat opening

keaton asked, do i look fat?
i snapped back, no, you look perfect.
she said, i don’t know these jeans feel too tight.
without blinking an eye i said, no, they fit perfectly.
she asked, do you still love me even though i’ve put on a few pounds?
i said emphatically, i certainly would if that were the case, but i was thinking you actually lost a few pounds.
then she said, well even so i think i am going on a diet.
i said, if that’s what you want to do, but personally i think you need to eat a little more.

she smiled, and left the room.

and i had executed the perfect cranelegs defense to a tricky am-i-fat opening in the chess game of communication between mars and venus.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

dumb move bob, you going to pay the price for that move, you have to give them a fighting chance.
"do i look fat" has nothing to do with body image, there is something else in the background and you did not let her bring it to the front.
sorry bob but give us a call when the wounds heal.

itsmecissy said...

Looks like you dodged a bullet my friend . . . keep up the good work!

Anonymous said...

ooh, what dangerous questions..."need to eat a little more"--good one...but expect more traps in quick succession....

Anonymous said...

Bravo. Well-played, sir.