469. something about 12/31

there is something about 12/31 i can't place my finger on.
it's the one day of the year i think of change.
big change.
the type of change i'd be proud of.
the type of change i never make.
so i can think about it again next year.
same time.
same place.
same life.

hmm ... maybe andy has it right. (see 468)

467. another christmas, another calf competition

alas, the brothers crane had another full bodied christmas.
the once a year summit of 50-something stupidity culminated in the annual calf competition (as in who has the biggest), which was followed on the heels, so to speak, with a bounty of impersonation ad libs.

inevitably, a guest won the competition (this year, it was the pseudo step daughter’s boyfriend)—a crane never wins, after all, we’re cranes.
but this year's impromptu “ya wanna be a millionaire with the stars” with yours as regis philbin stole the show.
and in its wake, i discovered once again that a son’s love for his father is larger than any embarrassment that might be cast upon him, no matter how deep and no matter how prolonged.
ah yes, it is the holiday season.
the true spirit carries on, and all is right in bob’s world—albeit fleeting.

466. a cranelegs season greetings

peace on earth and good will toward humans and house broken dogs.
everyone else … not so much.

465. women in bondage shoes

i was recently at a neighborhood christmas party when i spied a rather normal woman in all other respects wearing a pair of shoes with straps and strings and ropes that essentially looked like serious bondage paraphernalia for the feet.
it’s as if high heels and pumps didn’t bring on enough pain.
oh well, in some circles i suppose they are sexy but until i see men promenading in the same, i have my suspicions.

460. christmas tree zen

when my life gets to be much, which has been the case for weeks now, i like to lay on my back, inch under the christmas tree till my head reaches the stand, and look up into the branches, lights, and glisten.
it numbs the "much" in life.
i call it christmas tree zen.
and if you add a glass of fine wine, well, you've pretty much have found a winer wonderland.

459. black and white in living color

sometimes i see in black and white, other times in living color.
i prefer in living color but it's a high energy, high risk, high reward proposition.
so i tend these days to lean towards black and white, which at least includes snow.
and that seems to be enough color to hold me over.

(from the files) 135. enhanced interrogation

i said, gee i don’t know but what is this enhanced interrogation mitt romney keeps talking about—sounds like torture to me.
benny said, well it’s not torture. it’s interrogation that’s enhanced.
i asked, well what does that mean?
benny said, it's a new and improved interrogation.
i pressed on, but what does that mean?
benny said, you are so dense. let me put it this way. if it were torture, it would be called enhanced torture but it’s not. it’s called enhanced interrogation.
i said, maybe mitt should call it torture-lite.
benny said, ya know, sometimes you’re so unamerican.
then i said, yeah, well sometimes you're such an enhanced american.

and we left it at that.