"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Sunday, February 28, 2010

the crowd idiot

i saw lewis black perform the other night.

(he was hilarious; but that’s not the point)
i sat in the back row.
two seats to my right sat the crowd idiot.
they always sit within arms length of me.
i don’t know why this is always the case but it is as much a certainty as newton's laws of gravity.
(I suspect it might have something to do with my "if it's good news, it must be someone else's" life credo.)
anyway, this is primarily why i hate to go out where people gather, but i’m getting off point.

between jokes, the crowd idiot was compelled to bark out words in an idiot’s tongue.
he did this a dozen times—an idiot's dozen, which could be as high as 31.
he wasn’t funny.
he wasn’t engaging.
he was a particularly stupid crowd idiot and he sat two seats away.

then i had an “ah ha” moment.
ushers should be armed with assault rifles and allowed to remove crowd idiots from the gene pool before they procreate with their tainted seed.

3 comments:

Lisa said...

Hello, I was just Blog-Hopping and ran across your blog. Very Nice!

Be Well...

Robert Crane said...

Thanks for hopping by and taking the time to say hello. you be well as well.

itsmecissy said...

I LOVE Louis Black, were his parents in the audience? They are SO COOL! Alas, I've only seen him on the Comedy Channel and on an interview on one of our local (KGO-SF) talk radio shows.