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Thursday, December 4, 2008

778. if i were a wildebeest, i'd be spectacular

knowing what i've learned from animal planet, i'm thinkin' i'd make a spectacular wildebeest.
and that greatness would spring forth from a most simple plan.

first, i'd stay in the middle of the herd, figuring that lions and hyenas would never take the time or trouble to get to me, given all the other choices they'd have.
second, when we crossed a river, i'd wait to see if any of the knuckleheads ahead of me got munched up by crocodiles, then i'd make my move.
and third, i let the others drink the water and chew on the grass first just to see how they fared because this is one smart wildebeest who has no intention of getting worms or nothin'.

and if i stuck to those three rules, i would probably live to be the biggest and oldest wildebeest ever.
why, i might even become what is known in wildebeest circles as a wildelegacy.
more than likely, i'd even be urged to write my wildememoirs in the twilight of my wildeyears for sure.
and i would call my wildememoirs, i am wildelegend!

yes! that would be so much more wildemeaningful than what i have in store for me right now as a rather pedestrian human.

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