"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

(from the files) 537. what happened to my stock

within the last month or so, i've fallen ill a few times.
i'm blood-pressure medicated, and i'm slowly losing the use of my right arm.
but i'm not complainin'.
however, at the mention of these dastardly ailments, keaton smirks disdain at what she believes to be my self-serving embellishments of clintonian proportions.

that's okay though.
i always find a way to mask the hurt she casts with smiles.

well today i blog further wounded by a bout with what i can only describe as life-threatening, bubonic pneumonia influenza, to be honest.
but i'm not complainin'.

keaton would minimize it as a common cold if she could.
but she can't because she's not here in my hour of need, as she is safely on the left coast gettin' smarter and some much needed sunshine.
meanwhile i lay here near death, holding down the fort, waist deep in mushy, mucous-absorbed tissues, making sure the dog is fed, evacuated and rested, casting my own life to the winds of air purifiers so that others might carry on.

and i'm left to ponder, where is that hearty stock my mom always talked about?
what happened to those rugged wales genes and that stoic german blood?
have they been evianed down by that damn one eighth. that french eighth?
could it be that unbeknownst to me, i've darwinianed towards french whine.
these thoughts will consume me the rest of the day.

alas, i can only hope that i come to sort them out before i perish at dusk's closure.
adieu!

5 comments:

trustworthypooh said...

jeeze bob you sound just like me and i only married french.my hearty pioneer stock diluted by modern excess i recently recovered use of right arm[hand] after i stopped being my own doctor and discovered a pinched nerve in my neck.
does anyone know i am here?

Robert Crane said...

first off, thanks for dropping by and taking the time to leave a comment.
second off, my lips are sealed regarding your being here.
and last off, my little toes no longer move. is there no end to my lowly state?

Anonymous said...

Geez...!!!Buy a chicken and some good veggies and make yourself a big pot of chicken soup...with lots of noodles. It will cure anything!! I promise!!!!! Ask Keaton for directions, it's easy. If I were there I would make you a big pot of it. My office loves it when I bring it in....no more sniffles....

Robert Crane said...

aha.
nothin' for nothin' but there's a smirk in that post.
i recognise that smirk.
more subtle, more mature, almost floral in its essence.
but a smirk nonetheless.

smile thru the hurt, i must tell myself.

Anonymous said...

OK, now you are going to hurt my feelings and Keaton will be really mad at you. I really would make you a pot of soup...and I will next time I'm up there....but you will probably be fine by then. Guess we'll have to go the the City and eat :)