"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

(from the files) 449. like a dog with that special stomach enzyme

i said, hey hon, you won’t recognize the fridge, when you get back from your week of schooling. i’m cleaning it out.
keaton said, that’s great, just make sure you get the garbage out so it doesn’t stink up the house.
i said, what garbage? i’m eating up the leftovers like there’s no tomorrow.
keaton said, there might not be a tomorrow if you ate that two month old chili.
i said, i did and i live to talk about it. it was quite satisfying by the way.
keaton said, you must have the special stomach enzyme dogs have. you are probably part canine.

i thought for a moment.
then said, that might explain why i beg for food too.
she said, yeah! now if i could only get you to fetch and sit on command, i’d be the luckiest woman in the world.
then i said, yeah! and if i could only reach my private pa—
keaton interrupted and said, believe you me, then my life would be perfect!


Pam said...

After watching Bear (our cat), grooming himself in places too polite to mention, Tom used to say,
"Boy, if I could do that, I would've never left home."

bob said...


lightly said...

men are spineless, the fact that we can't bend like that is a mystery on its own.