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Wednesday, June 10, 2020

The Holiday Go and Shop

We were about halfway through the drive to our vacation destination when it started.

"Do you need to go to the bathroom," Keaton asked.

"Nope. I can make it to the end." I did not ask the expected follow-up question because I knew the answer, and I did not want to stop for I was on track to set a travel speed record of sorts.

"Okay," she mumbled.

Ten minutes later. "We have to stop in Stockbridge. I've got to go bad."

"All right," I replied, "but please don't turn this into a go and shop. I'm beggin' ya."

She wasn't having any of it. "Well they do have great little stores and restaurants. We can get a lobster roll. How does that sound?"

"That's a bribe," I replied. I could feel my position losing ground. "Look, we are on a record breaking pace here. Let's not throw it all away for a lobster roll." My argument was weak but it was all I had.

"What's the big rush? We're on holiday babe."

"It's not a holiday. It's a vacation. The closest holiday is like weeks away. What's with the holiday stuff?" I was deflecting.

"It sounds so European. Holiday."

"But we're going to New Hampshire. You know, 'the live free or hang' state."

She corrected me. "That's 'live free or die'."

"Whatever. It still sounds crazy to me. I mean it should be 'live free or maybe not so much'. Death is not a choice I would make."

"Are you done because death will be a choice I'll make for you if we don't stop in Stockbridge. My motto is 'I pee or you die'!"

And that's when I was reminded there is always a bit of danger lurking nearby when I travel with Keaton.

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