"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Saturday, March 13, 2010

jan’s latest internet dating fiasco

keaton's friend jan was over last night.
she told us about her latest adventure in internet dating.
after exchanging several email pleasantries, she agreed to meet the internet match-up at a restaurant.
the moment they sat down, he said, so your profile says you like the theater.
she thought, hmmm ... he actually cares about what i like.

she replied, yes, i love it.
he asked, what do you think about puppet theater?
she said, geez, i don’t know.
he said, well, i hate it. do you?
she said, well i haven’t really seen one since i was nine.
he said, so you don’t hate it.
she said, well i haven’t really thought about it, but where do you even find a puppet theater these days?
he said, oh, they're all around us. They're insidious. it’s a puppeteering plague.
she said, well what’s wrong with it?
he said, i always feel gypped at the end because the actors aren't real, they're pine wood.
she said, i see.
then he said, i really love that tv show, deep space nine. do you?
she said, i'm sorry to say that i'd rather go to a puppet theater.
he said, hmm, well that sure is a show stopper.
then her cell phone rang, as she had prearranged with her sister.
she took the call.
after she hung up, she apologized but had to excuse herself and leave, departing under the guise that her dog had just been arrested for loitering while on a suspended dog license.

she told us that in retrospect she had a pretty good time, although usually she makes it through appetizers before deep space nine comes up and ruins the whole evening.

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