"if it's good news, it must be someone else's"

Friday, June 19, 2009

906. the law of big numbers

i have been told i have a keen sense of humor.
i'm here to tell you, i don't have a sense of humor, and even if i did, there would be nothing keen about it.
i mean, come on.
have you read some of this drivel?

nope.
no sense of humor.
not a laughvoyant.
scent of humor?
maybe, after all farts can be funny if properly timed.
but sense of humor?
nada.

now what i do have a sense of is the law of big numbers.
if i write something with the intent of being particularly jocular, someone out there is bound to find it funny.
see?
the law of big numbers.
with a world population of 6.5+ billion people, there is bound to be a handful who are going to smile at this stuff.
the trick is finding them.

which brings me to the internets.
that's where you find them.
gotta love the google search and tricky seo smart tags.
it finds them.
eventually.

need an example?

well, like pam for instance.
she lives in rochester, new york for god's sake.
no one lives there on purpose, unless of course they lived in new jersey first.
and i have no idea what people from rochester laugh at.
probably jokes about people from new jersey if i had to guess.
but there she was, just waiting for something to make her laugh.
and thanks to the internets, i come along.
the law of big numbers my friends.

another example?
all right, take another unlikely sort.
he travels in internet circles under the name lightly.
he lives somewhere in western canada.
i think on a farm as best i can piece together.
the only people who live there are people who move out of rochester, new york, and certain parts of south africa.
what makes those folks laugh?
if i were a bettin' man i'd say frozen american jokes.
but i don't know any.
so what's the probability i'd find someone there who thinks i'm amusing.
four words.
the law of big numbers.
(five to perfectionists who have to count every word)
and thanks to a wayward google search, bingo!

need one more example do ya?
how about, itsmecissy.
a librarian type from san jose, california.
la la land.
the governator.
they laugh at san francisco.
but not itsmecissy.
she laughs at benny and andy and me for cryin' out loud.
what kind of nut job, i mean, one in a billion chance is that?
and why?
yup, the law of big numbers!

Yes indeedy.
sometimes i lean back, take a look at this posse of mine, and think, holy cow! what a group! thank you law of big numbers!.
and then i weep for an hour or so.

oh baby!

4 comments:

lightly said...

we laugh because there is this stupid law that don't allow us to kill the stupid people.
we not laughing with you we laughing at you.

i live in western canada because the gods thought this was a good joke to play on me. take me from darkest africa and stick me in the frozen north yeh real funny. but wait take me from open farm land and stick bang in the centre of a major city, nice one there Zeus .

yes i visit the pond because in here i not the only nutcase.

there are many times i sit on the curb contemplating my navel and god comes and sits with me , all he does is shake his head and say "even i can't help bob, he keeps screwing with the numbers"

bob said...

i was right.
i didn't think you were from rochester.

Pam said...

There's something in the air in Rochester. Someone told me I was full of horse pucky the other day, another person told me I was nuts, a third person called me "beautiful lady" followed by the fact he was overdue for an eye exam.

So I came to the POND and found my pals hanging out. It's a great place to be.

itsmecissy said...

"la la land?" Defined as

1.) A place renowned for its frivolous activity.

OR

2.) A state of mind characterized by unrealistic expectations or a lack of seriousness.

Kinda like this here Pond sometimes. I'll be here till all the water dries up.